Friday, February 20, 2009

Signs She's Getting Bored Having Sex with You


* Bangs her head on the headboard BEFORE you begin.

* She yells out her own name.

* Asks to be on top so she can balance her checkbook more easily.

* Holds up a picture of the Playboy centerfold to hurry you along.

* Keeps asking, "Are you SURE you're not gay?"

* Instead of asking to leave her shirt on, she wants to leave her pants on too.

* Her moans of delight discovered to actually be a WAV file.

* During the act, she screams, "Oh, baby, yadda, yadda, yadda!"

* You begin to suspect she is only "playing" dead.

* You find yourself sitting backstage at the Jerry Springer show.

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